Tuesday, 22 December 2009

Christmas Stockings Finished!!!!

I have finally finished them!!

If you want any info on what I did just contact me via a comment. Back in new year x

Nearly there and feeling ready!

Well, despite my panicking the other day I now feel more organised and ready to tackle the impending Christmas! M's birthday done. Friends visiting done. House sorted after friends done. Everything bought for Christmas day done. Now I just need to get to Mother's and enjoy it!

Loving the snow, makes you feel really in the spirit of things and lifts the light at this time of year.

JJ is in full crawling mode now. There seems no end to his ability to cover the floor at speed. He is even trying to pull himself up onto his feet - how things change so quickly! Lots of bumps to the head though - I'm sure we'll look back on those Christmas photo's and smile at the bruises one day...

Happy Christmas to you all. Oh, and the Mother is being much better. We went out for drinks with friends in St A on Thurs night when it snowed and ended up stranded, having to stay with friends. She was babysitting and was staying the night anyhow and was fantastic. I walked home in the morning and came back to a calm house. What a relief! Think it also did her good as she now knows she can cope. Brilliant!

Thursday, 17 December 2009

Christmas next week????

I cannot believe that time is running away with itself. I keep looking in my diary and realising that it is next week! Aarrrrggghhhh, so much to do before then.

Things that need doing (in no particular order, although I must get it in an order at some point!):
Packing for Mother's
Packing for MIL's (heading pretty much straight there after leaving Mother's)
Sorting JJ's food, milk, bottles, clothes, nappies, bedding....etc
Wrapping presents
Writing cards
Going to supermarket
Making mince pies
Making a pudding
Icing cake
Taking cat's to cattery
Watering plants/Christmas tree
Cleaning house (I have a thing about coming back to a clean-ish house)
M's birthday (20th, how inconvenient!)
Putting people up, sorting spare room
Cleaning up after people have left
Actually spending time with M and JJ before mayhem at Mother's
FINISHING christmas stockings (yes, alas they are not finished...)
and many more I can't think of....

Is there a sense of panic....? Well, no, but it will come on the 23rd and I will be a raving lunatic rushing around trying to finish everything.

Oh well, it's Christmas after all. Enjoy! This might be my last post in a while so see you all again in the New Year!

Friday, 4 December 2009

Biting Baby

JJ is on a mission. Not only is he desparate to get his nashers on his food and toys but he's taken a liking to me, more specifically my left arm. I have bruises to prove it, teeth shaped and all.

If only I could blame them on a passionate night with M....

I ask you, is it a good look to have baby-sized love bites? Is it cute, is it endearing, or is it just downright painful?

How do you stop a baby biting when they don't understand the difference between your arm and a soft toy?

It's not the mother-in-law I'm worried about....

Ok, so this is a bit of a personal issue I have, but I'm going to talk about it anyway because I need some thoughts on it from others (and neither the mother-in-law or mother will read this, I hope).

It's my mother.

I thought that, when your daughter has a baby, your mother would be the most wonderful person on Earth. Well, it turns out that she still as no interest in my baby JJ. Part of me wants to provide lots of reasons, no, excuses, why she is like this and the other part of me just wants to shout at her. He's the story...

Alright, let's be personal here, my Dad died of cancer over a year and a half ago. I became pregnant soon after because, well, we really weren't thinking about getting pregnant then and it just kind of happenned. Great news, I though Mother would be really pleased and glad that something would take her mind off losing her beloved. No. She was pretty disinterested from the start. My sister-in-law was also pregnant, 2 months ahead with her second, and she was more concerned about her it seemed. I don't mean to come across as jealous, I really wasn't, but my Mother seemed to have let me down. I wanted support, I wanted emotional support and advice. All she gave me was the guilt-trip that I wasn't spending enough time with her or phoning her enough (hold on, really pregnant and holding down a stressful head of department teaching job does not equal enough time for the husband, let alone anyone else!). I could have screamed!

She was on holiday when I gave birth - she had actually asked me in advance whether she should go, but I gave birth early so it was just bad timing. She was excited at the start but kept away. Now, I'm not a shrinking violet when it comes to my thoughts about how I want to live my life and bring up my children, so I guess my Mother didn't want to interfere in case she got both barrels, so to speak. I can see that maybe I wasn't the most stable of people after giving birth (who is?!) but I remember her coming to visit sometime in the first week and asking whether I had the 'baby blues' and I promptly cried in front of her (cardinal sin). I thought the balance would shift and she'd take over, give me that emotional support, but she didn't. There, there, was all I got.

Moving forward 8 months to today - she has just looked after JJ this afternoon for 1 1/2 hours for the FIRST TIME since he was born. Ok, she has taken him for a walk once before for half an hour, but nothing since then. She hasn't even offered. I would have muscled in with my daughter and sent her off shopping or to have her hair done or something. Do I sound callous and unforgiving? Should I be grateful I have a Mother that I see every few weeks, if I'm lucky, even though she lives 20 mins away?

I have spoken to a number of friends about this and they say I should confront her about it. About the lack of interest - she will literally come for a visit, make me get the coffee whilst she parks herself in her 'chair' and updates me on her social life. She doesn't even pick up JJ unless I give him to her. Then she recoils when he squirms (which is about every other second) and passes him back to me. Heaven forbid it she should actually get down on the floor and interact with him. Aaaarrrgggghhhhh............. How was I entertained when little?

Well, the answer to that was that our Grandmother (Mother's mum) lived with us and I think probably took care of us most of the time. Maybe Mother isn't maternal? She doesn't seem to have the genes for it.

The title refers to my Mother-in-law. Now, she's a different kettle of fish. Ok, so she has 2 other grandchildren she's practiced on as they live nearby. But MIL actually plays with JJ and makes him laugh and gives him bottles/feeds him without me having to ask. We have left him with them on numerous occasions when visiting so we can actually get some time out together. Mother recently cancelled a babysitting session (on M's birthday in a few weeks) because she 'forgot' about a carol service she wanted to go to. Aaaaaarrrrggggghhhhh. MIL would jump at the opportunity to babysit, if only she didn't live in Devon!

I'm stuck with a dilemma. Mother is suppossed to be looking after JJ for 1 day a week when I go back to work. She doesn't even know him. She has no idea about his routine or how advance he has become. She never asks. But if I confront her (and I'll go both barrels) it will destroy this arrangement I'm sure.

So, we've arranged for some 'visiting' sessions at her house (I have to book these in weeks in advance because of her busy schedule! Ha!) for her to get used to him. I'm going to write EVERYTHING down about his routine and feeding etc. I'm looking into playgroups she can take him to in her area. What else can I do to ensure it works? I can't change her genes.... (unless science has advanced gene therapy to include the introduction of maternal genes that is).

Answers on a postcard.

Tuesday, 1 December 2009

Sleepless in St Albans has gone Off-line

Wooo Hoooo. A night of unbroken sleep!!!! Actually I was the one who woke up, but it is still classed as unbroken! He did it. Stirred a few times but made it through after his 10pm bottle.

I'm guessing you're looking at the dates of the posts and wondering what's going on - well I'd saved my last post to finish at a later date, hence why it's so short, and then Eureka! Now, how long do we reckon this will last?

I'll keep you posted!

Sleepless in St Albans

Sadly, nothing to do with Meg Ryan's tasteful impression. No, it's JJ. He has been waking in the night too many times to remember, wanting bottles of milk which he duly downs in one before returning to a short-lived slumber. I'm putting it down to lots of things - teething, cold/snotty nose, not drinking enough milk in the day (seems to have gone off it), not drinking much of his bedtime milk....the list is endless because there has to be some reason, surely?

I'd like to say I'm completely zombiefied, but my body seems to have got used to broken sleep as it's had so much practice at it.